hilang profesionalism

aku marah kat office hari ni..
hilang profesionalism aku..
drp production aku naik atas office dengan berdegup2 jantung aku..
bkn degup sbb takut..
tp sbb x tahan nak mlepaskan kemarahan..
ni sume setan la nih!

aku da lame aim org ni..
aku prasan die x suke aku..
tp aku wat bodoh je, wat keje aku sendiri..
stiap kali aku tanye, mmg nak x nak jawab..
stiap kali die lalu depan aku wat aku mcm x wujud..
stiap kali ade kal utk aku n kebetulan die yg jawab, die panggil skali..
yg lg skali org lain panggilkan..

tp td aku hilang sabar..
bdk kat office (org lain) kate die kal aku dr production..
urgent katenye, brg nak kuar tp x de QC stamp..
aku pun kelam kabut turun..
sampai kat production aku jumpe die, die jln menonong..
aku panggil die, die x toleh..
aku sabar lg anggap die x dengar..
pastu aku x sempat nak kejar, aku kal die..
aku tanye "brg ape yg x de QC stamp"..
die jawab "adalah kat bawah 2, ok la i bz".....terus die letak fon
babi

aku naik atas dengan perasaan mmg x tentu arah..
ni namenye bom da nak meletup..
dengan layanan die yg mcm puaka slama ni aku diamkan..
aku naik atas office, aku hempas pintu..
aku straight g tempat die n tunjuk jari aku..
bkn jari tengah, tp jari telunjuk..
aku ckp " u jgn nak melampau boleh x, u igt i n i ape, sesuka hati..bla bla bla"
org lain pandang aku dgn pandangan terkejut..
aku x pnah bersuara kat office 2..
aku bersuara bila org tanye or time angkat fon..
x pnah bersuara sbb untuk bercerita..
x ramai kat office ni n aku sorang je melayu..

org lain tenangkan aku..
aku kluar n hempas pintu lg..


hilang sudah profesionalism aku..

i say n he says

"u owe me", says dominic to diana (pronounce daiyen)..
what the heck,
after i reject ur offer then u said that i owe u..
i owe u because u give me this job..
desperate ke bang?
(puih, x nak mcm prasan pla aku nih)



Alhamdulillah, i got job offer, nearer to home..the basic is a bit LESS than now..uppps, don't judge too fast! add with the allowance, the nett salary SLIGHTLY better than now..who cares the difference, i really want to move asap..grateful to Allah cuz grant my pray..

my boss counter offer me..better than the new offer..i decline..he negotiate and keep negotiate, and i give reasons and reasons..he replies to all my reasons..he try to fill the holes that bother me so much..


i say: one of the reason, this company does not have prayer room
he says: it actually in my plan, juz need time to commit..u will have the prayer room soon, u should ask me that..

i say: i want to work closer to my home
he says: u getting married rite, so u should live with ur husband..so u can choose where to buy ur house..the salary i offer u will cover the transport and rental house..(poyo je org tua ni)

i say: i was boring, i just enjoyed working here once, during the big audit time..i learn a lot..but now i only key in data for a month!
he says: so sad i cannot provide audit day for you everyday..((we both laughing))..u know what, u r too fast..i already put in my plan, my priority to have you manage quality dept in 3 plant, including singapore n indonesia..u will have a lot of work, involve in management..how i wish u to be my leader n sumday be a manager.. (ngantukkk)

i say: i have no friends here at all, i'm alone (kuangasam air mata nak jatuh plak, gile tapir)
he says: i am very sorry that i cannot help u with that..but u close to ur QC inspector rite..

he say: u go back n think carefully..if u still want to go, do me a favor..don't leave now, juz wait until i get replacement. u at least owe me that!
i say: oh ko, dlu bkn main lg ko paksa aku benti awal eventhough aku ckp tender kene 2 bln n ko paksa benti sbulan gak smpai aku mrayu wat muke x malu kat x-boss aku utk lepaskan aku sbulan, n siap merayu dapatkan bonus lg wlupun benti awal..huh! (dalam hati je ckp)

this kind of picture

this is my sister's wedding photo with my late parents..how i was touched by looking at this photo, my tears came out, uncontrollable.

1 fine day, InshaAllah i will be married too but i can't afford to have this kind of picture. never.

Al-Fatihah for my mother n father.

Almarhumah Menah Binti Nambong

Almarhum Mohd Noh Bin Mohd Amin

sensitif

post ni patut aku karang right away mase aku terase 2..
tp asik postpone n postpone..

aku sensitif..sgt sensitif..
nampak kuat, tabah, slelamba, gila2, suke wat benda bodoh, x denga kate org, mulut bole thn mcm puaka,
tp aku sgt sensitif..
ntahlah, da natural ataupun org ckp semulajadi..

hati aku mcm telur kuning..
kalau setakat gentel ngan jari, x de pecahnya..
tp kene cucuk ngan lidi terus meleleh2..
sedapnya kalau makan telur mata separuh masak..iklan..
walaupun luas permukan jari adalah lebih besar dr luas permukaan lidi..

susah aku nak lupa bile aku da trase..
aku tetap berfikir dan terus terasa..
x bestnya jadi camni..
tp ttp kene bersyukur, sbb aku punya perasaan..aku bukan telur kuning..

aku x tau aku nak citer kat sape bile aku trase benda 2..
aku nampak benda 2, terus sentap..
tp aku still lagi senyum kat die..
tp smpai lah ni aku x paham..
da lah terasa, x paham lg..haih..
knape die buat mcm 2..
aku bole terima org yg x suke, benci meluat ngan aku buat benda mcm 2..
tp die adalah org yg sanjung (perasan), yg kate dpn2 suka kawan ngan aku..
selalu share rahsia kat aku, ikut je ape advise aku..
tp die buat mcm tu..x paham..
nak kate aku bengap, baru je amek soalan IQ td dpt 126..
pening..

dulu pernah, sbb nak turutkan kerisauan die, aku dengan beraninya buat benda bodoh..
sampai org x percaya kat aku..
nyesal ngan aku...
pandang sinis aku..
tp aku puas hati sbb aku x menyusahkan semua org..kononnya..
rupa2nya, benda 2 bukan kerisauan yang sebenar..
buktinya aku nampak benda tu..jelas lg terang..




p/s: aku rindukan kak ain..kak ain da mcm kakak aku yg sbena..die jarang bukak tenet, n aku rse die x bace blog..die keje kat flex sbg qms engineer..die anggap aku lebih dr adik die..die sgt baik dan die terbaik..sori sbb buat akak menangis sbb sy tinggalkan akak..benda ni la yg wat aku nyesal tinggalkan flex..tsk (hingus).

choices

or options..
God give the choices..
we choose one..

life is full of choices..
just like maze..
you go the wrong way, u got stuck..
u go the right way, u get the luck..
but no worries of making the wrong choice..
u can return back even it's time, energy or maybe money consuming..

from what i have gone thru, get the best offer doesn't make it is the best choice..
we need to think very far way, open up the box of your mind..
u will find the bad about the best..
and u also will know the good about the bad..

human live with everything..
we deal with anything..
we don't survive alone..
even the survivor in the lost island drinks the water from the sea..
so when we making a choice, ensure that u do not lonely survive..
u will died out of boredom and regret for the rest of your life..
that's sucks..


i got 2 jobs offer, best salary in kl, but i chose jb..whatever it is, money not only the matters..
friend of mine, eh fiance of mine, have 2 choices to be made, just same like me..the best offer in kl, but jb suits him better..

bisnez

keturunan menah n mohd noh ni mmg la otak bisnez..maju x maju lain crite..7 adik beradik aku (termasuk yg da meninggal) sumenye gila mencari duit thru bisnez..nak kate ikut mak ngan bapak aku x de plak bisnez2 ni..bapak aku keje buruh, lepas accident bwk teksi..mak aku surirumah, masakkan bekal pegi sekolah..

dari yg 1st sampai la last (aku) sumenye ade bisnez masing2..dorang sgt konsisten..aku je jual itu la jual ini la..n jgn x percaya aku pernah jual sampul raya yg aku dpt free dr akak aku yg keje kat cimb..jgn kate laku, smpai bergadoh2 berebut nak beli sbb x ckup..dan banyak lg kisah perniagaan aku especially mase kat flex..

yg pelik tentang diri aku, bisnez tengah maju, income tenga masyhukk, aku stop dgn tiba2..sbb aku malas, walaupun aku da lantik beberapa ejen untuk uruskan..sampai lah ni dorang oder VCO and tupperware, aku wat bodoh je..sgt2 x bersyukur! padahal bkn skit aku dpt..

skang ni bisnez dulu x abis n x manage btol2, aku migrate ke bisnez lain..bisnez ape, biarlah rahsia dulu..aku nak dptkan customer2 luar dulu..n hopefully maintain semangat aku ni bila ade oder berlambak2..tp kalau x de oder, jgn risau, aku akan bertambah semangat buat 'kempen'..itu la aku..

sgt x suke dgn perangai aku ni..haish~

gamba mak n bapak aku..mmg ternyata lain dari kami..selain dr minat meniaga, minat mengumpul babad gak lain..kitorang sume bnyak babad, mak bapak aku slim je..wlupun abg2 n akak2 aku tuduh aku dlm fb yg aku plg bnyak babad, tp aku tetap rase akak aku yg juara.

miss mother n father so much.. :(

audit

audit ni quite a big one..
to determine this company got the tender or not..
haih, bile da responsibility 50% on my shoulder..
the rest 50% divide by the rest of another employer..
it's like i can be operation manager after all..
tau, x layak, eh belum layak..

but this is tiring..
not tired because of to do a lot of things..
tired because i went for googling and facebooking all the time while worrying abt the audit..
no help from others, have to survive in the deep sea alone..
drowning and trying to get out to see the light of the sun..alone..

working at every different company have their own pros n cons,
the only thing that will determine our interest is fun or not fun..
when we do the job, does we sincere to the the job given..
does we commit the job just being told to, or we want to..
even we hate to stay there and do the job becoz we were told to,
at some point of time, u will realize how good for the future..
the experience of trying to adapt this kind of new environment..
i do face that at this moment..
how challenging when i have to suffer before because i have no interest..

but after went for the audit, they give me the token of appreciation..
the audit went very well, just some minor findings..
they always convincing me, this is the real training for me..
although new, i have to take the responsibility alone deal with this test..
with the hope and trust from the top management..
now, customer trust me too..Alhamdulillah..
many more challenge to come..

i may not get this opportunity to learn even in the most exciting-fun-big-company that i wish to work for..
this is what they always tell..
u go to the small company ar, u kene sapu sume keje meh..
yeay it is true though..i face it..even for the clerk job..
but if we think otherwise we can see more the advantages..
the smaller the company, we will be exposed more..we will know more..and more and more..
not only internal matters, we will see the external one..
outside from the atmosphere..
i learn how managers to managers talking..
i see the bisnez and engineering correlations..
i feel the stressed situation of the successful person having..
n i am taught to be a good auditor/auditee as well..
it is all because i involve on their meetings..
this is better than official training..



to my senior ops manager, da la x bg angpau raya cina lepas..da abis audit ni, blanje la mkn mhal2..keep compliment me not so very good meh..i akan jd riak n malas lg ok..look wat do i do now..blogging meh..

rentetan

rentetan dr post sebelum ini..
Alhamdulillah..celcom yg salah..i owe no debt ok..

We are tested in many different ways..
This proven to be happened..
Allah can give whatever He wants and can take back at any point of time..
Lesson learned..

shock

i was shocked..mcm kene renjatan elektrik..kene renjatan elektrik pun x shock camni..
nsb baik low blood pressure..klu x, kene heart attack aku..

dlm sekelip mata,
Tuhan boleh bg sume n Tuhan bole tarik sume nikmat..
this is true my dear fren..

to think of why why & why, we need to calm first..
as i always do, close my eyes with a calm mind..
don't ask anyone around you the question of why..
ask that to yourself..why this happen to you..
not this way --> ha, knape aku!!!??
but this way --> knape aku?
are you really deserve the chance?
is that your right at the first place?
whatever it is, God test the human that He loves..
He loves me..Always love..

to be in trouble actually not so bad thing..
it keeps u learn n learn n learn..
the person not in trouble don't feel the 'sweetness' of it..
it is the greatest feeling after u pass the trial from God..
u will be more grateful. InshaAllah.



p/s: cuba tenangkan diri bile dpt tau phone bill aku rm421.11 dalam mase 1 malam..

marah dgn puaka

asik rase nak marah je pagi2 ni..
bile iman da kurang dalam diri..
mula rase nak lempang sorang demi sorang..

bestnyer kalau dpt jd penyabar..
takde la rse serba tak kena..
bole senyum je bila pandang musuh..
bole helakan nafas sikit demi skit bile denga benda menyakitkan hati..
bknnye hembuskan karbon dioksida sebanyak yg mungkin pastu kate 'bangang!!!'
tp alasan je klu x dpt jd penyabar..
2 sume diri sendiri yg pilih..



2 la sape suh x byr ptptn dlu..tp aku da bayar skit demi skit nok..
pinjam rm5000, byr blik hampir rm2000, baki terakhir mse Jan'12 = RM5403..
puaka, sila balas email/pertanyaan/rayuan aku. mcm mane la ko boleh jd pegawai kat situ. mmg puaka.